


5 Times Natsuki Subaru Ruined the Moment

by ningdom



Category: Re:ゼロから始める異世界生活 | Re:Zero Starting Life in Another World (Anime)
Genre: 5 Times, M/M, enough shoujo cliches to fill a dictionary, im fucking dumb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-17 21:24:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9346421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ningdom/pseuds/ningdom
Summary: 5 Times Natsuki Subaru Ruined the Moment(+1 time he didn't)





	1. time 1

**Author's Note:**

> just fucking kill me

 

1. 

 

Step. Step. Step.

The act of putting one foot in front of the other and moving forward was getting increasingly difficult, but Julius pushed through the sharp twinges of pain and soreness in his limbs with practiced ease. Warm breath on his neck continued to assure him that the heavy weight on his back was only unconscious.

When Subaru had collapsed shortly after their defeat of the Cultist Archbishop, Julius had been worried. The possibility that Subaru had suffered an attack that Julius hadn’t noticed was likely, but after a cursory glance where he’d been unable to find any serious wounds, Julius had concluded that the cause for Subaru’s collapse might have been simple exhaustion. Feris had warned that he didn’t think Subaru had slept since before the White Whale’s subjugation, but, regrettably, Julius hadn’t taken the warning to heart.

Between the stress of taking on the White Whale, the Cultists soon after, and having Nect open between them for such a long period of time, Julius was surprised that Subaru hadn’t gone down sooner. For even well-trained warriors and knights the last few days would have been taxing - Natsuki Subaru was a weak man - boy, even; Julius wasn’t certain on Subaru’s age, but he was more than likely still a teenager - with little to no combat training or stamina reserves built up.

With a small huff, Julius re-adjusted his grip on the legs at his sides and heaved his unconscious friend higher on his back. If Natsuki Subaru had managed to push himself past his limits, then by the _Gods_ , Julius could too.

He’d already sent a message with one of his spirits to the main camp to alert them of his and Subaru’s victory over Betelgeuse - the only thing left to do was meet back up with the rest of the group.

The forest seemed to carry on for ages. Julius was careful to avoid tripping over any upturned roots and fallen logs, staying loyally on the dirt path that twisted through the trees and would eventually lead them back to the village. With no company but the breath on his neck and his thoughts, he had to admit it was something of a lonely walk.

Almost as if summoned by the thought, the weight on his back suddenly jerked. Julius only had a moment to process before the familiar loud voice exploded near his ear.

“Hey! Hey, hey, hey!” Natsuki Subaru howled, legs kicking out madly. A wild arm whizzed by Julius’ face, nearly smacking him in the nose. “What’s this?! What’s this?!”

Despite the immediate feeling of annoyance that rose up, Julius couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face. He definitely felt a bit relieved, too - Subaru waking up meant that he could walk on his own, and what was left of the forest ahead of them suddenly seemed much shorter.

“What the hell are you smirking for, you jackass?! Put me down!” Subaru shouted, and kicked out with one of his legs hard enough to knock Julius out of balance as he was in the middle of taking a step. His foot came down on a slippery vine that was crossed over the path, and in a flash Julius was careening backwards, a shrill shriek in his ear.

They hit the ground in a confused mess. It was quiet for two heartbeats, Subaru seemingly shocked silent. His face was an angry red, and _very, very_ close - their noses were practically brushing. They had sprawled across the ground in a haphazard pile - one of Julius’ arms was trapped under his friend’s back, the other digging into the sticks and leaves beside Subaru’s head. One of Subaru’s legs was tangled between his, and there was only about a coin’s width in between their bodies.

Julius blinked, suddenly even shorter of breath than he’d been trudging through the trees with Subaru on his back.

Subaru stared back up at him, mouth slowly dropping open.

 _Ah,_ Julius thought blearily. _So that’s what that feeling was earlier._

Like it was something happening far away, he barely noticed Subaru taking in a huge breath below him, and he only had a moment to wonder why that should matter.

“Get… _UP_!” Subaru howled, straining his voice so loud that it cracked. A couple of birds cawed in the distance. Startled back into a proper frame of mind, Julius jerked to stand up, but his arm was still caught under Subaru’s back.

“Roll over. My arm is caught.” Julius said in the most reasonable tone of voice he could muster.

“ _YOU_ roll over!” Subaru shouted back.

Julius was slowly realizing that when dealing with Natsuki Subaru, ‘reasonable’ was prone to failure.

Subaru flailed wildly while still yelling, catching Julius in the side with enough force to almost hurt. Julius was momentarily thankful that Subaru had hit an area free of wounds. With a sigh, he quickly untangled his legs from Subaru’s and used the new freedom to move himself off to the side. Subaru scrambled away, and was on his feet brushing his clothes off in heartbeats.

Julius shook his head and stood up as well, his cuts and bruises burning from the rough movements. He hopelessly tried to get some of the dirt off his white clothes, and when he looked back up, Subaru was still standing across from him with a strange, pinched look on his face.

“...What?” Julius asked.

Subaru scoffed. “Nothing. It’s nothing.” His face was still red, although the tone seemed to be evening out a bit. “... Where are we?” He asked.

“On our way to meet up with the main camp. You collapsed shortly after we defeated Betelgeuse.” Julius said.

Subaru groaned. “I did, didn’t I? _Shit_ , that’s so uncool.” The second part was muttered under his breath, but not low enough that Julius was unable to catch it. With a frustrated grunt, Subaru took off down the path.

“It’s the other way.”

“A _aaaugh!_ Fine!” Subaru spun around and stormed past him, grumbling under his breath.

Julius fell in behind him at a relaxing pace. “Don’t think so lowly of yourself.” He finally said, after almost a minute of rare silence.

“...Huh?” Subaru bit out in a fairly rude manner.

“You’re not much of a fighter.” Julius started, and cut Subaru off before he could argue. “No, don’t start. I’m not being mean, I’m just telling the truth. But, from what Felis told me, you still held your own without fear against the Whale, and without you defeating Betelgeuse may have been far more difficult. I don’t think I would have been able to do it alone, for one. Take your credit where it’s due, Natsuki Subaru, and don’t sell yourself short for being exhausted.” He finished.

Subaru blinked at him, and coughed out something unintelligible.

Julius smiled. “What was that?”

“ _Ugh!”_ His friend groaned. “ _Than-_ Thank you. For. You know. That.” He gritted the words out like they burned. “And for. Car- carrying-”

Julius shook his head. “No, don’t say it. You don’t have to.”

“... _Wha?”_

He threw Subaru a smirk over his shoulder. “A knight will _always_ be happy help those in need and weaker than themselves without requiring thanks.” He said, half-seriously.

“Oh, _come on! Asshole!_ I swear, I’ll kick your ass one day!”

“I’ll be waiting, Natsuki Subaru!”

_\---_

  
  
  
  



	2. time 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok because i dont want to spoil anybody that's anime only, this fic assumes where after fighting the cult everybody just goes back to lugunica and is happy nothing goes wrong . 
> 
> also subaru is kinda weird here i had issues

 

2.

 

Ten days after their conquest against the White Whale, Crusch Karsten held an extravagant party at her mansion to celebrate their victory. Everybody that had participated in both the Whale subjugation and the attack on the Cult had been formally invited, and almost just as many had shown up. 

Julius would stab his own foot before he admitted it out loud, but usually parties weren’t exactly… in the realm of things he enjoyed. Despite the name, most noble thrown parties could be expected to be boring and stiff with far too much pomp and circumstance; the guests unwilling to take a step out of line so as to preserve their image. 

Crusch’s party was, thankfully, the opposite. Though Julius had held his doubts at first, he’d quickly been proved wrong by the sheer joy and jovial attitude of the party-goers. Their fighting force had been put together from all walks of life - anybody that had volunteered to fight had been accepted. Commoners, knights, mercenaries, and noblemen all mingled in the ballroom, and a good majority of the people out on the floor were dancing without abandon. The whole mansion seemed to be steeped in a rowdy mood of good cheer and excitement. Julius himself had even gotten up from his table once and gone onto the floor for a friendly dance with Felis. He’d quickly returned to his seat, but it had been fun.

There was one thing, though, that he couldn’t help but notice:

Natsuki Subaru was nowhere to be found.

Julius was stumped. The party seemed to be a perfect fit of atmosphere for Subaru - he could easily imagine his friend flitting from group to group with a large, foolish grin on his face.  _ And, hasn’t Subaru been staying in Crusch’s mansion anyways?  _ To be fair, Julius wasn’t certain whether or not that was still the case, but if it was…

He frowned. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Crusch herself walking past his table. 

“My lady, the party is wonderful.” He said, getting up from his chair to address her with a slight bow

She smiled. “Thank you, Julius. I believe that it is something we all needed.”

“Indeed.” He nodded. “But I was wondering, have you seen Subaru? Is he not here?” Julius asked.

Crusch’s smile got a bit bigger. “He’s around here somewhere. I’ve seen him poking around once or twice - I think he’s just trying to avoid the ballroom.” 

Julius blinked, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. “Why?” The immediate guess was that it was because Julius himself was there, and surprisingly, the idea stung a tiny bit. 

Perhaps his face had reflected his thoughts more than he’d realized because Crusch laughed a tiny bit and shook her head. “No, I don’t think think it’s anything like that. When I handed him the party invite he went on a tangent about why he couldn’t go, but he was very vague with his words. I got the feeling, however, that he may not know how to dance and is feeling self-conscious about it.”

“Why would that matter? He can just mingle with the tables. Nobody is required to dance.” Julius sighed.

“I can’t claim to know what’s going through his head.” Crusch simply replied. 

“...Okay.” Julius said shortly. “I suppose I should go find him, then, and correct this silly notion he’s confused himself with.”

Crusch stayed silent and simply watched him with an unreadable look in her eyes. 

Julius huffed. “It just seems ridiculous. He should be out here, enjoying himself, instead of wallowing somewhere in illogical self-imposed exile.” 

“Why should it matter to you, Julius Juukulius? Natsuki Subaru has never been ‘friendly’ towards you. Why go out of your way to give something that is not returned?” Crusch finally said, voice both equally curious and stern.

On edge from the abruptly serious question, Julius thought for a moment before replying. “It’s the chivalrous thing to do, is it not? To always extend a hand to a comrade? Subaru held his own during both of the victories we’re celebrating, and he deserves to celebrate them as well. If somebody needs to knock some sense into him, then so be it.” Julius said evenly, smiling slightly at the end. “Well, not literally. But you understand, no?” 

Crusch continued to watch him with the same odd look, one eyebrow raised. Eventually, she breathed out a soft laugh and shook her head. “Yes, I do. Alright then, go onwards, Julius. I won’t keep you here any longer. The last time I saw him, he was hovering around on the second floor.”

Nodding his thanks, Julius headed towards the stairs to leave, only stopping as Crusch’s voice rose up one last time.

“Only part of that answer was truthful, Julius Juukulius - I recommend you take some time to sit down and think about things before you get hurt.” She called after him, voice light and teasing.

Julius looked back at her, confusion twisting his face into a frown. “But I wasn’t-” He started, but she had already disappeared into the crowds. He blinked and shook his head before heading up the stairs. There weren’t as many lights lit on the second floor, but it wasn’t dark enough that it was hard to see. Dim shadows flickered along the walls in tune with the candle flames, giving off a sleepy and relaxed atmosphere. As the second floor hallways weren’t exactly intended for party use, Crusch had left them darker to encourage guests to stay downstairs. 

“Hello?” Julius called out. “Subaru?” 

A muffled crash from behind the larger middle door in the hallway, the one that led out onto the terrace, made it clear that Julius wasn’t going to have to search for long. The scene that greeted him when he slipped past the door almost made him laugh. Subaru was sitting on the floor at the foot of one of the tables, rubbing his lower back with a pained expression. A chair that he’d presumably been sitting in was overturned a few inches away from him. 

“ _ You!”  _ Subaru snarled upon sighting Julius, stumbling to his feet like a baby deer. From the way he winced as he stood, whatever he’d hurt when he’d fallen over was probably still bothering him. “You startled me!” 

Julius cocked his head slightly, a small smile sneaking onto his face. “What are you doing up here, Natsuki Subaru?” 

Subaru scoffed, turning towards the terrace platform’s railing with his arms petulantly crossed. It really was a beautiful night, the cool air crisp and fresh but not so cold that it was uncomfortable. Stars twinkled merrily in the sky above them, and the town of Lugunica below was still well-lit even in the far hours of the night. Julius was surprised to note that he could still hear the party music - someone had probably left a window open in the ballroom. 

“Sometimes a man’s just gotta have some time to himself, you know?” Subaru muttered under his breath.

Julius raised an eyebrow in disbelief. “Forgive me if I’m wrong, but have you ever been a ‘time to himself’ type of person? I can’t imagine it.” He spoke with a teasing lilt in his voice, a kind of playfulness that he’d never really presented until Natsuki Subaru had come along. Something about Subaru just seemed to bring out the worst within himself.

Subaru’s face took on an awkward, pinched look as he averted his eyes. “You’d be surprised, I guess.” He said quietly. “Back home, I was pretty introverted. I really only interacted with people that were far away.”

Julius frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well- uh…” Subaru trailed off, looking perplexed. He sucked his bottom lip in, biting on it absently. Julius’ eyes flickered down, feeling oddly transfixed by the mundane action. “Letters, kind of? But… fast. Instant.” 

“Instant letters? That sounds convenient.” Julius mused out loud. “I take it this method of communication isn’t available here?”

Subaru looked up, startled. “Yeah, actually. We had… special metia back home.” 

“I see.” Julius said. They fell quiet for a few moments as a raucous bout of cheers rose up from the floor below them. Subaru took the moment to turn around and right the chair he’d knocked over that was still on the floor, forgotten by their conversation. “The party sounds fun.” Julius remarked offhandedly.

Subaru nodded. “Yeah.” He looked relieved at the change of subject, although his eyes took on a suspicious slant. “Did someone send you after me?” He grumbled.

Julius shook his head. “No. I came of my own accord. Why are you sitting up here alone? Many people are wondering where you are.”

“...Really?” Subaru asked, perking up slightly. “You’re not messing with me, are you?” He grumbled.

“Not at all. Felis was especially… vocal.” Julius said.

After a few moments of silence, Subaru finally sighed and shrugged loosely. “I don’t know how to  _ dance.”  _ He blurted out in one wheezed breath, like the words were some grave, important secret.

“So?” Julius asked.

Subaru glared at him nastily. “Ha, ha. It’s a  _ ball.  _ I don’t wanna go out there and trigger the, ‘ _ Subaru-kun, will you dance with me’  _ flag and not know  _ how to dance!”  _

“I’m not going to pretend to understand half of what you just said, but you don’t have to dance. Plenty of people are simply sitting on the sidelines and still having a wonderful time.” Julius tried to reason, but Subaru had worked himself up too much and was still going off on a tangent. “Were you hoping to dance with Emilia?” He asked.

The mention of Emilia drew Subaru from his rant, face flushing red. “... Maybe.” He conceded in a grumble.

“I figured.” Julius nodded. “I’m sure she wouldn’t mind teaching you on the floor. You should ask her.” He spoke truthfully.

Subaru rolled his eyes in disdain. “That’s so  _ lame.  _ I can’t do that. What’s the appeal in a guy you have to teach to dance? None. Nada. Zip.” 

Julius shrugged. “I’m not too bad at it, myself. I could teach you the basics.” He shrugged. The words came out evenly, but something in his chest began to flutter like a trapped bird.

“HUH?!” Subaru shouted, bristling like an angry cat. “Why the hell would I-”

“It would just be up here,” Julius went on, cutting off Subaru’s tirade before it could begin. “We’re friends, are we not? I would be happy to help.” 

Subaru eyed him, visibly torn. “... We’re not friends. I hate you.” He finally muttered. 

Julius smiled. It wasn’t a no. He reached out and grabbed one of Subaru’s hands, feeling the other man jump slightly at the contact. Subaru’s eyes were wide, and he swallowed so hard that Julius could hear it. Julius couldn’t help the illogical rush of thankfulness that he’d left his gloves back on his table in the ballroom - Subaru’s hand was warm and soft. Dozens of tiny scars that he’d never noticed were littered across the fingers and palm, bringing teeth marks to mind. 

“Were you attacked by an animal?” Julius asked.

Subaru flinched, looking out of sorts. “I- yeah- you could, uh. You could say that.” He stuttered out. “A-are you gonna show- show me how to dance or what? Just. Stop making it weird.” 

Blinking, Julius shook his head. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean. But, yes. Let us begin.” He moved the hand around and let it rest on his back, pulling them closer together. Subaru garbled a couple of words out, but Julius was undeterred. “As you’ll most likely lead if you dance with Emilia, I will assume the following position for this. Your right hand goes on your partner’s back,” He instructed, and grabbed Subaru’s other hand with his own, entwining their fingers. “And you hold the hand of your partner with your left.” 

“O-okay.” Subaru choked out. “Simple enough.” 

Julius nodded, smiling. “A simple box Waltz goes as such - you take a step with your left foot,” He stated, and waited for Subaru to catch on and take a step forward. Julius moved in tandem. “Then, move your right foot to the side, and return your left foot to the right. This is one half of the box - for the other, you simply do the same thing in reverse until you are back where you started.”

Subaru stumbled at first, and they were more walking than dancing, but soon they were able to do a simple step in tune to the muffled music from below them. Subaru’s face had steadily brightened in color as they’d gone on until he was redder than an appa. Julius hoped that the frantic beating of his heart wasn’t visible on his face. They bumped into the table once or twice, but for the most part, Subaru picked up the rhythm fast. 

They slowed to a stop as the song trailed off, standing close with their hands still wound together. Subaru’s hand on his back felt like a branding iron. Swallowing, Julius nodded encouragingly to his partner. “You’ve got it.” He said. “This would traditionally be…”

“... The kiss scene, right.” Subaru croaked. “If I was dancing with - with someone else.” He ripped his hands from Julius like they were on fire and took a step back. “I- uh. God. I have to. I have to go.” He turned around and took a couple of steps towards the door before stopping. “Thank- thanks. You’re still a- a goddamn jackass. But, thank you. I guess.” He bit out, voice wavering between harsh and soft, and the next moment he was gone. 

Julius stood awkwardly where he was left, and dropped his hands back down to his sides. The night air was only getting colder, but he could barely tell through the warmth in his cheeks and stomach. 

“... You’re welcome.” He said to the empty terrace.

\---


End file.
